August 13th Road Trip and Concert Recap

LAKE OZARK TO HAMMOND – 12 HOURS OF ECSTASY

Since it only took twelve hours to return to Lake Ozark from our Merrillville, Indiana, hotel and the Clay/Ruben concert near Chicago, I have plenty of time left today to do my recap. If there are short gaps between sentences, don’t worry…….when my head hit the keyboard nothing essential was harmed….like the keyboard.


Nan and I were up at 4:30 a.m.Thursday and rarin’ to go…..well, at our age, sorta slow-motion rarin’……but we were out of the house by 5:30, Nan in full makeup and me full of coffee, so we both felt we would be able to cope in the dark. Now comes the
RECAP of why it took us over an hour to get to Eldon – 11 miles from my house. Obviously I had not had enough coffee. On our first foray, we didn’t get out of the driveway before I turned and said to Nan in the pitch dark, I better get my knee brace, just in case……as if the worse thing that could happen to us was that my knee would go out…..such innocents we were then.

Next we made it about a half mile when I turned and said to Nan in the dark, I wonder if I left the garage light on? I made what I thought was a U-turn at the first cross-street and started back to my house. After a while I turned and said to Nan in the not-quite-so-dark, I don’t think we’re on my road anymore…..these houses don’t look familiar……another U-turn and we returned to the original turn and in the dawning light I said to Nan, I think this is my road. Sure enough it was my road, and the garage light was on. Nan was very understanding.

On the last foray we made it to the stoplight at the end of my road, when I turned in the daylight and said to Nan, (I was somewhat startled to see she what staring straight at me), I wonder if I have my phone. I searched my handbag. No phone. Now, I had to have my phone, in case the dog sitter needed to call me (btw, the dogs were quite excited each time I re-entered the house and were rather pissed when they didn’t get their usual treat.) So I pulled into a bank parking lot and searched my tote bag (plastered with Clay pix, of course). No phone. So back to my house we went…… all the time trying to remember where I was the last time I used my cell. The dogs were snarling when I entered the house this time. I found my phone, took a xanax, sidestepped the snarling dogs, turned out the garage light, and limped back to the car. Nan was still staring.

When we arrived in Eldon, an hour late, Joan and Joyce were QUITE ready to go and off we went, Nan and I in the back, Joan driving her luxurious Lincoln Town Car, and Joyce navigating with a bulging folder of printed directions from various sources at the ready.

The trip seemed to be going well for several hours. I slept most of the time, (trying to be unobtrusive, naturally) but could hear Joyce reading directions off and on. Then I kept hearing , “where is highway X? why are we going right through the middle of town? we have to turn around and go back for aways.” This woke me up.

I hate to reveal that this happened more than once. Since I am not trusted to drive by anyone I know (by that I mean, anyone who has ridden with me) I appreciate any and every one who gives me a ride and only occasionally asked, “what city are we in now?”
When I learned we were in Chicago/Indianapolis megalopolis, I sat straight up. We seemed to be in an inner city area. I deduced this by the narrow, crowded streets and
bars on all the windows and doors and gas stations with HUGE black bars at pay windows. We are going very slowly with stops at each intersection. Joyce is mumbling directions and Joan is repeating she can’t read the street signs. Nan and I are clutching one another in the backseat like Hansel and Gretel in the forest.

This continued for quite awhile until Joan finally deciphered a street sign and low and behold we were on the right “track”. Joyce’s directions became street by street turns and we all eagerly awaited “Casino Roadway”. Unfortunately, things were not that simple. We were back to, “turn around and go back to where we made the wrong turn.” My only contribution during this was, (which was only half in jest) “Look for Lake Michigan”

On our way back to “where we made the wrong turn”, we even sighted the majestic Horseshoe casino building and complex itself. Unfortunately, we could not actually see a road going to it. It was kinda like Cinderella’s castle far off in the mist. So we did what every intelligent middle aged, Midwesterner does. We pulled into a McDonalds to ask for directions. (here’s the very best part of this story). As Joyce was getting out of the car, the lady the SUV sitting next to us with her door open said, “you look like you’re lost.” Joyce ran to her like Poo to a honey jar. We watched out the window and this angel of mercy talked very slowly to Joyce, who returned to the car with a beatific smile on her face.

“This lady says she will lead us there.”

We had been on the road 12 hours and arrived exactly an hour before the concert was to begin.

And so ends the story of our road trip to the Clay/Ruben concert,……….except for the parts where the valet parking attendant told us we were in the lot for “Players” only (and in possession of cards denoting such status, of course) and Joyce begged him in a little girl voice and tears in her eyes to let us park there – which he did. ( who says big city folks aren’t generous) And the part where we wandered through the screaming slot machines endlessly searching for a bathroom.

Oh, and the concert was great and Clay and Ruben were in great voice and comedic spirits and the band was great and loud and the audience was appreciative of both men
and Clay looked great (except for the hair). My theory is that he lays face down on a sturdy ironing board and Ruben sprays starch on whatever hair falls on the board and then irons it and when Clay gets up that amount of hair stands straight up like a “L” from the top of his head.