CREATIN' AINT EASY, FOLKS




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EARTH PLAN B
In my blog of December 19th, I copied this great “God’s In Box” for your reading pleasure.





At that time, you may recall –(what? You haven’t memorized these masterpieces? Well, that's why i copied it again.) that I mentioned “wouldn’t you really love to know what is in God’s folder “Earth Plan B.doc”? Well, I have some ideas of my own. Too bad I wasn’t around in the beginning to help Her a little with Plan A. I love to decorate. I could have been a big help. So here are some of my ideas…..

GENI’S REMODELING PLAN

First, of course, women would be in charge of the planet from day one. We are much cleaner and things would look a lot better around here after these few billion years. What a colossal mistake that was…putting men in charge! Women are so much stronger than men, too …everyone knows that….do you really think men could go through childbirth – more than once? Well, now that I think of it, I guess that’s why God made women the childbearers in the first place……but then I wonder if God planned on there being six and a half billion people on this flimsy planet….hmmmmm, but it’s probably hard to think that far ahead, after all.

But I digress….women are stronger….and smarter……more compassionate….. more creative…..and most important of all….more peaceful. What was the Creator thinking, putting men with their ego, competitiveness, and aggressive nature in charge!! (Well, I guess some women might qualify here……but let’s skip these finer points, ok?)






Well, back to the beginning. To start with, I would have put wings on humans. Yes, think about it. If we could fly….there would be no need for roads, no cars, no wrecks, no pollution, no wars for oil. No planes – no 9-11. No global warming, no ozone depletion – stick with me here – no noxious emissions from cars or air conditioners. All those wings fluttering would take care of over-heating – hmmmmm, maybe the Creator WAS male, obviously He wasn’t too concerned about hot-flashes…..oooppps, digressing again.

With wings we could get to where we need to go real quick. More time for shopping and visiting with less spent on traveling. No not reaching a hospital in time. No more separation from families. (Well, some daughters-in-law might not think that is too good an idea…..damn, this is harder than I thought it would be…ohno!, did I just cuss? …..losing celestial credibility real fast, here) We could carry our babies with us. No more strapping them backwards in a seat behind us just to keep them safe.

There would be more woods and certainly more flowers if I had been called in as decorating consultant(and not all that land would be paved over for parking lots). It must have been an oversight that there aren’t more flowers. Oh, I know some people love wildflowers, and yes, they are pretty…..but I’d love to see a field of peonies, or a forest of lilac bushes, wouldn’t you?





And I would have created a better way of communicating between humans….and between humans and animals. My dog would love to talk to me, I just know. ..bet yours would too, or your cat. I bet pets would really like to be able to express their love for us more clearly or their dissatisfaction with a particular brand of pet food. Who knows? Maybe they don’t like to be called pets….maybe they hate their names and would prefer Matilda to Muffy. Well, though, a wagging tail and purring are pretty expressive.

I was thinking about mind reading. No more deception, no more lying, no unearned praise, no self-serving flattery. Only truth. That would be nice. Sometimes it is so hard to express your real feelings, your appreciation, your love, what you really want and need. How much better relationships would be if our real feelings could be intuited without words.

Well, perhaps that’s not the best idea (da……darn it, this is much harder than I originally suspected). There would have to be some kind of inner mind-control. Not every thought needs to be known by others. There are some feelings better left unsaid. Clay would never perform publicly again if he knew half of what’s in the minds of some Claymates…..not me, of course….. but some, I’m almost sure…….



Clay Aiken in Angelic mode from his Joyful Noise Christmas 2005 Tour which Skeet and i saw in KC.

And speaking of that performer. I would certainly have created a universal CAappreciation gene. Then everyone would be able to know what it is to be transported by a voice so beautiful and expressive…..football and soccer stadiums would fill to overflowing. We would all fly in ourselves and save all that airfare money. And an extra bonus of the CAgene would be WE wouldn’t have to put up with eye-rolling and snide remarks from those who just “don’t get it”…..just sayin….

Hmmmmmm….now that would eliminate those nasty reviewers, too, wouldn’t it? – curse you EW!! Ohmy! Now this has turned ugly. Very ungodlike….sorry…..but …..
it’s just me, after all, geni


P.S. I definitely would have decorated the sky with more stars and maybe a couple more moons…..and they would each be in different phases, of course.